Vacation

I need to take a vacation from my mind. The sad part is it goes wherever I go. Over analyzing situations. Constantly processing information to give me the correct response. Sometimes it gets it wrong. Her lately it has been working overtime and it is exhausted.

I am pretty sure it wants a vacation from me too. I mean, I am taking it through. I am trying to visualize what I want in life. Working on my future in my present life. I am reciting affirmations and creating vision boards. Then I am combating them with real world talk and destroying the boards.

I am listening to self help messages and motivational speeches in the morning. At night, I am crying myself to sleep. I promise my brain needs a vacation from me..probably

Even then, it would not have a vacation..because I don't know how to vacation. I am suppose to be relaxing right? Yet, to just sit still and be quiet..just don't seem right. I should be out doing something..talking to somebody..right? Laying around the house, doing nothing is just lazy..right? Who am I comparing myself to, is that the reason I can't sleep at night? Some imaginary person that does everything right...thats who I need to measure up to..right?

I think my brain just caught a flight. Probably, sitting on somebodys beach keeping the Pina Coladas flowing. I think I might just allow it to lead. Calm down and slow my speed. Give my brain what it really needs.

A real vacation.